Getting old

On Saturday I got back from a draining week in Gran Canaria with seven of my bestest buddies, and in this blog entry I'm going to provide a simple review of the trip. I'll start with the bad bits then move onto the good.

The bad bits

1. Gran Canaria is a dump
At least, the bit we were staying in was. We weren't expecting heaven on earth or anything, and we've been to some notorious dumps before (Magaluf, Tenerife, Ealing) but Granny C steals the title of biggest dump by a country mile. You couldn't move an inch on the street without being offered drugs or someone trying to lure you into a whorehouse. There were pickpockets all over the place and two of my mates had their phones nicked (agreed, they shouldn't have taken their phones out but still). You had to go a long way to find a restaurant that served half-decent food, so once again most of us ended up hugely malnourished.

2. The weather was crap
We were unlucky on this one. The first two days were scorchers but it went downhill from there. The rest of the days had a bit of sunshine in the mornings but quickly went overcast and stayed that way. It's no fun sitting around the pool when the skies are grey, and on one afternoon it rained and we stayed inside and watched an entire womens football match (it was that bad).

3. Long journeys
We had to connect at Madrid both on the way out and on the way back, which was a pain in the ass especially on the way back. Due to a combination of Iberia staff being grumpy and unhelpful plus Madrid airport being designed soooo badly we had a complication on the return leg and there was a lot of cursing / borderline panic going on. We didn't know whether our bags would make it back but thankfully they did, which prompted some joyous celebrations at the Gatwick baggage belts.

4. I can't hack it anymore
This is probably the biggest of the negative factors - I simply don't have the energy I used to. It wasn't the amount of drink that was consumed but the lack of sleep that did me in. It's a well-documented fact that I don't like clubs/dancing and I even went home 'early' on a couple of nights when the others all headed off to the clubs, meaning I got in by about 4 o'clock rather than 6 or 7. I always try to get up early on holiday too so I was normally out of bed by 10, or 11 latest. I even had a night in - yes, a night in - whilst the others went out, just because I wasn't feeling the going-out vibe. I always have the most fun when we start drinking in the apartment from about 8pm to midnight, our own music in the background and everyone's chirpy and getting into the mood. It's also good in the first couple of bars where the banter continues and we get tanked up. Then it usually goes downhill for me because the banter stops and the dancing starts - that's not a dig at the lads at all but just the way it is for me. It's my fault for being an anti-dancer / lover of verbal banter.

Ok, enough of that, let's get onto the better stuff.

The good bits

1. No one fell out
Our holidays in the past have seen some epic bust-ups but last years was blissfully peaceful and so was this year.

2. Great stories
There's more of a 'what goes on tour stays on tour' promise amongst us this year than ever before which prevents me from going into too much detail, but there were some great tales from the holiday. Chris, making his holiday debut, set a record for the drunkest anyone had ever been (which took some beating let me tell you). Our thongs provided much entertainment for ourselves and others unfortunate enough to be sat around the pool (don't ask, we're not gay, honest). And we all agreed that the first night was the best first night from all the holidays we've had - wrestling, late night swimming, singing, extreme drunkeness, high spirits all round. The memories will be cherished.

Thanks for reading.